Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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