I look better un-naked...
only if we run a train.
done.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
