quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
