I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
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I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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