I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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