so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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