FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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