so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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