HIV tests are more positive than that guy
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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