Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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