I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize