she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
