mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
