im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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