dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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