i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
