i don't like sucking hair
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize