Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
MIDGETS
????
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
