I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
pray to the hookup gods
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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