i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
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