shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Randomize
