No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
