She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
