If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
When are your genitals available?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
