i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
