and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
