Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
