so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Randomize
