Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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