I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
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