i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
We are two peas in an std pod
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
