Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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