Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize