it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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