and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
