if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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