There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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