sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
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