It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
