I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
