just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
let's call it "werewolfing"
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green