I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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