I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
this is an emotional support booty call
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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