her vagine was all disorganized.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize