Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
