I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize