Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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