I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
