But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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