No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
