Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
